The start of a new year often brings excitement and optimism for setting goals and making resolutions. Yet, many people struggle to follow through. In fact, according to some research, the number of people who maintain their resolutions dwindles to 43% after just three months.
What explains the psychology behind our failure to keep up with our New Year’s resolutions? And what are the most common obstacles to achieving our goals? Here are the top 10 reasons I’ve seen and even experienced myself.
1. Unrealistic Goals
Setting unrealistic or overly ambitious expectations can lead to frustration, disappointment, and, ultimately, giving up on the goal entirely. When goals feel unattainable, motivation dwindles quickly.
The key here is to set realistic and achievable goals that you can work toward progressively. Think about the logical order of completing the pieces. What should you do first, second, third, and so on?
You can also try the SMART method to structure your goals. According to this method, you should set goals that are:
Specific: Clearly define what you want to achieve. Avoid vague or broad statements.
Measurable: Include criteria or metrics to track progress and success.
Achievable: Set a goal that is challenging but realistic, considering your resources and constraints.
Relevant: Make sure your goal aligns with the bigger picture of your overall plans.
Time-bound: Establish a deadline or timeframe to create urgency and keep yourself accountable.
2. Lack of Specific Planning
Without a clear plan, even the most well-intentioned goals can lose momentum. Break your goals into smaller, manageable steps to make progress feel less daunting. Evidence-based planning tools can be extremely helpful.
Pomodoro Technique
The Pomodoro Technique was invented by Francesco Cirillo, who used a kitchen timer to parse his work into 25-minute intervals and short breaks. If you have issues with multitasking, missed deadlines, and burnout, this method could be a good fit.
The five steps to the Pomodoro Technique are:
Start a 25-minute timer on your phone or computer.
Work on one specific task until your alarm sounds.
Take a five-minute break.
Take a longer 25-30-minute break after you complete the 4th pomodoro.
Repeat as needed until you finish your project.
The benefits of the Pomodoro Technique include improving your single-tasking skills, becoming better at tracking your productivity, and getting habituated to taking regular breaks to help you refocus.
Eat the Frog
Developed by Brian Tracey, this time management strategy is inspired by a quote often misattributed to Mark Twain, “If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And if it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first.”
According to this method, you should start the day by tackling the most difficult or least appealing task on your agenda. Doing so can give you a sense of accomplishment, provide motivation, and set a productive tone for the rest of your day—not to mention, all other projects you work on afterward will feel easy in comparison.
Eat the Frog is a good option if you struggle with prioritization, procrastination, and effective planning. The most difficult part of the process will likely be ranking your projects by priority and knowing when to delegate as needed. However, this often gets easier with time.
Time Blocking
This time management strategy involves becoming more aware of how you spend your time during the day to help improve efficiency and productivity.
To get started with this technique, plan to:
Divide each 24-hour day into small blocks of time.
Estimate the amount of time required to complete each of your daily tasks and assign them to time blocks in a planner or calendar app.
Schedule breaks between the start and end of each task.
Work your way through your daily schedule.
If certain tasks take more or less time than anticipated, adjust your schedule accordingly.
Time blocking is an excellent strategy if you often get sidetracked by distractions, forget to take breaks, or juggle multiple projects at once. If you’re willing to put in the effort to create detailed daily schedules (and stick to them), you can see major improvements in your performance.
Pickle Jar Theory
The Pickle Jar time management technique is ideal if you’re a visual learner who wants to work on setting priorities, avoiding distractions, and improving your delegation skills.
Start by imagining a pickle jar that is filled with sand at the bottom, pebbles in the middle, and rocks on top. These three components represent different aspects of your daily schedule:
The sand comprises unwelcome distractions that take away from your tasks at hand. Think disruptions like phone calls, emails, or social media notifications.
The pebbles represent responsibilities that aren’t urgent or that you can delegate.
The rocks are the most important projects that you should complete first.
To implement this technique, categorize your daily responsibilities into these three areas, then focus on the rocks, put the pebbles on pause, and avoid the sand.
3. Poor Energy Management
Failing to allocate adequate time for your goals can hinder progress, but time isn’t the only factor that can set you back—there’s also energy. Many people focus solely on scheduling tasks but overlook energy management.
Different tasks consume different amounts of energy. For example, spending an hour cleaning your home requires a different type and amount of energy from spending an hour socializing with your friends.
To maximize productivity, plan your tasks around the times of day when you’re most energized. The idea is to prioritize your tasks so that you don’t run out of energy before you get to the things that matter. Techniques like time blocking or scheduling high-energy tasks early in the day can help.
4. Lack of Motivation
Motivation isn’t always the spark that gets you started—it often follows action. Dopamine levels, which drive motivation, increase after completing tasks, not before.
To stay motivated:
Understand the root of your goals. What is your motivation? Is this an extrinsically motivated goal or an intrinsically motivated one?
Try visualizing your goals or rewarding yourself for progress.
Create a sense of urgency with deadlines and accountability partners.
Interestingly, some research suggests that all goals are extrinsically motivated at their essence; however, there are certainly intrinsic motivations that are more powerful for grounding the goal-setting process. For example, a development goal based on someone’s values alignment is more powerful than one anchored in getting rewards for performance.
5. Fear of Failure
It's natural to fear failure when setting goals, but this fear can paralyze action.
Fear isn’t all bad, though. It often signals that we’re stepping into uncharted territory or challenging ourselves in meaningful ways. Instead of letting it paralyze us, we can approach it with curiosity and intention. Ask yourself: What’s the worst that could happen if I try? What’s the best that could happen if I succeed?
As you pursue a goal or resolution, you may naturally encounter setbacks and challenges. Instead of viewing these as definitive failures, look at them as opportunities for growth. Reframe mistakes as learning experiences that bring you closer to your goals.
6. Procrastination
Procrastination, often rooted in perfectionism, can derail progress. To combat this:
Understand the reasons causing you to procrastinate so you can better address them. Is it boredom, anxiety, distractions, or something else?
Break tasks into smaller steps to make them feel more manageable.
Try implementing time management techniques and breaking down tasks into smaller steps.
Celebrate small wins to build momentum.
7. Lack of Support/Accountability
Having a support system can be crucial for achieving goals. Share your goals with friends, family, or a mentor who can help you stay accountable. Also consider setting a timeline with regular check-ins to ensure consistent progress. A deadline can also create a sense of urgency.
8. Negative Self-Talk
Negative self-talk can sap confidence and undermine your ability to stay focused. Oftentimes, this inner critic comes from internalized societal messages we unconsciously adopt, like “I should be better at this.” Recognizing that these thoughts are learned—and not necessarily true—can be a powerful first step in overcoming them.
To counteract negative self-talk:
Practice reframing these thoughts into empowering ones.
Use affirmations like “Every step I take is progress” to reinforce a growth mindset.
Consider journaling or exercises like “Morning Pages” to clear mental clutter and identify hidden self-limiting beliefs.
Negative self-talk doesn’t disappear overnight, but awareness and intentional effort can help you replace it with a more empowering narrative. And by nurturing self-compassion and practicing self-love, you create a stronger foundation for pursuing your goals with confidence and clarity.
9. Planning for Potential Barriers
Many people fail to anticipate obstacles or adjust their plans when circumstances change, making it difficult to stick to follow through with a resolution. Watch out for these three setbacks:
Lack of flexibility: Goals can sometimes become rigid, causing individuals to stick to a plan even if circumstances change. This can be detrimental to progress.
Tunnel vision: When people fixate on achieving a specific goal, they may overlook other important aspects of their life or work, causing burnout and reduced overall satisfaction.
Competition and comparison: When goals are shared among a group or team, individuals may feel pressure to compete and compare themselves to others, which can lead to negative self-perception and resentment towards others.
In yoga, we talk about the balance between effort and ease. You can apply this to general goal-setting. While it's important to challenge ourselves to grow, we should also allow ourselves grace to prevent harm and injury.
10. Poor Stress Management and Lack of Self-Care
Pursuing ambitious goals can create high levels of pressure and stress, which may lead to negative health outcomes and reduced overall well-being. This is probably the biggest barrier to us not being able to achieve our goals.
When your nervous system is in overdrive, logical decision-making and focus are compromised. In other words, if we feel overwhelmed, goals appear that much more unrealistic. However, when we are both physically and mentally calm, we’re more able to:
Focus on tasks without distractions.
Think creatively and explore possibilities.
Make rational decisions without being overwhelmed by anxiety.
To stay emotionally and mentally balanced while pursuing your goals, try incorporating stress management techniques like mindfulness, yoga, or regular exercise into your routine.
Wrap-up
By understanding these common pitfalls and implementing strategies to overcome them, you can increase your chances of achieving your goals and making your New Year's resolutions a reality.
Want to learn more? Let me teach you how!
My mission is to help people achieve their goals while managing stress with purpose and resilience. As a clinical psychologist, I support clients in developing tools to overcome challenges, reduce overwhelm, and approach their goals with clarity and confidence. If you’re ready to take control of your emotional health and achieve your aspirations, book an appointment.
For groups, I also offer workshops, retreats, and trainings on goal-setting, stress management, and mindfulness. Don’t hesitate to reach out to schedule one.
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